you know how when you go to a concert or show of some sort and the person on stage is like “HOW’S EVERYONE DOING TONIGHT?!?!?!?!” and the audience cheers back? why? you’re not answering the question, you’re just yelling. imagine if we did that in daily conversation. “hey jeff, how are ya?” and jeff just starts screaming and clapping in your face
sail boats are the easiest thing to steal ever because they don’t have a key because there is no engine. all you need is a sound knowledge of the wind and a yearning to conquer the seas
and a knowledge of how boats work
that is also very very important
- in memory of a deceased loved one
- because you happened to pass by a tattoo shop
- because it is your favorite quote
- because it’s from your favorite TV show
- to show dedication to your romantic partner
- because you liked the design
- because it has a deep meaning to you
- because you were young and stupid
- because you fucking wanted to.
don’t be friends with seniors because they will graduate and leave you and it’ll suck
DON’T BE FRIENDS WITH UNDERCLASSMEN BECAUSE YOU WILL HAVE TO LEAVE THEM AND IT WILL SUCK
don’t be friends with seniors if you’re a senior because they’ll go to a different college than you and it will suck
dont make friends
glad we sorted that out guys
Me: “What browser are you on?”
Me: “Google Chrome?”
Client: “No, just regular Google.”
Me: “That’s the site. I want to know the browser.”
Client: “Look, we can have this conversation forever, man. But when I hit the internet logo, Google comes up!”
Me: “Okay…What does that “internet logo” look like?
Client: “…A fiery fox, I guess. But that’s irrelevant.”
"where’s my christian grey????” hopefully locked up in prison
christian grey is white and wealthy he’s not going to prison any time soon
Dont wanna talk about it. Kills me to say it. I”m not over it.
Well, that just turned me into the worlds angriest.
"She was filled with regret before she died. She felt like she’d failed us as a mother tremendously."
"Did she say something to you about it?"
"She never said anything, so I don’t have any tangible proof that she had regrets. But she had a very bad substance abuse problem. And I know she always wanted to be a good mother. So I separate my mom from her disease. I always imagine that my mom and an alcoholic were living in the same body. And I know that my mom loved us. And that she hated the alcoholic."